It seems as though almost every day I bear witness to, or am recounted of what can only be described as a failure of society. The brutally peaceful existence of the modern man, free from the threats women face on a daily basis, is a stark contrast to the woman’s experience. Never have I been followed home, never have I been catcalled, never have I been sexually assaulted. The fact that all three of these are not only common, but practically accepted in today’s world should be appalling to every last one of you. Why is it that men feel entitled to act in such horrendous ways in this day and age? We as men should all feel a collective shame for condoning such behavior to continue through our silence and our inaction.
The only explanation as to why so many men behave in such a disgusting way towards women is their inability to see women as fully human, with feelings and emotions equal to their own. Men adopt the distorted mindset of objectifying women as possessions, believing they are somehow entitled to their attention or even their bodies. This mindset further perpetuates the belief that, by simply dressing a certain way, women are enticing unsolicited comments and tasteless behavior. However, if men were to step back and consider the experience of women in such situations—when they truly place themselves in women’s shoes—it becomes evident just how harmful and wrong this mindset is. In the current equation, men hold the power to choose because it is men who make the choice to catcall, harass, and assault. The numbers are sobering: In 2022, the Dutch Centraal Bureau voor de Statistiek (CBS) reported 2,900 rape cases and 3,000 cases of sexual assault. In fact, since 2020, the number of reported cases in the Netherlands has increased exponentially. Even more troubling is that these figures likely under-represent the reality, as only 1 in 10 cases are reported—a direct result of the lack of action by authorities and the stigma of being a victim.
This reality is unacceptable. All of us, regardless of gender, should feel perfectly safe and comfortable in public spaces, no matter when or where. A 2018 study by Fondation Jean-Jaurès found that among a random sample of 6,025 women from France, Spain, Italy, Germany, the UK, and the USA, an average of 14% of women had been whistled at in the past 12 months. The situation is even worse for women under 25, with this average increasing to a disgusting 43%. According to data from the UN Entity for Gender Equality and the empowerment of Women, only 39 countries worldwide have laws prohibiting sexual harassment in public spaces. Among those countries are the Netherlands and other European countries where sexual harassment has not diminished in the slightest. In fact, Spain, where sexual harassment was criminalized in 1995, ranks number one in Europe for sexual harassment according to Fondation Jean-Jaures. According to their study, 65% of sampled women under 25 reported having experienced whistling, sexist insults, or vulgar gestures in the past year. These statistics lay bare a clear moral failing of the modern man—a failing that this article condemns in the harshest terms. Our efforts must primarily be a normative one because the legal institutions have failed to create change. According to the Rape and Incest National Network, only 310 out of every 1000 sexual assaults in the United States are reported. Out of those 310 reported sexual assaults, only 50 reports lead to arrests, and of those 50, only half of the perpetrators face incarceration. Given the systematic failure to prosecute cases of sexual assault, it’s difficult to imagine that instances of harassment are reported or prosecuted whatsoever.
The failure of our judicial systems is a direct result of biases in favor of men that permeate our society. Historically, law enforcement was and still is a male-dominated field, as are many branches of government. This male bias leads to a lenient treatment of perpetrators and a lack of urgency towards the testimonies of women. Many men see no problem with objectifying women so long as they’re “only joking.” When paired with how our media overly sexualizes and objectifies women, this leaves ample room in male-dominated fields for objectification to be the norm. Movies, social media, and our own interactions conditioned men to view women as objects first and humans second. Even in our education systems we are taught to view women through a conformist lens as caregivers or purely objects of attraction. Simultaneously, young girls are taught to tolerate harassment and place blame upon themselves for having attracted it. This reinforces a culture of silence and of victim-blaming where the first question is about what the victim was wearing, not how such a thing could have happened.
There has been a concerted effort by the most repugnant members of our society to associate feminism with unattractive, colorful-haired women who simply hate men. If you ask any guy his thoughts on feminism, you’re likely to hear some sort of misguided rhetoric bashing feminists. Beginning in 2014, a massive wave of anti-feminist content flooded the internet by members of the alt-right. Through hundreds of “feminist cringe compilations” and “feminism debunked” videos by neo-nazi and far-right content creators, a generation of boys was radicalized against women, the unluckiest being dragged down the alt-right pipeline. This wave came alongside Gamergate, in which women who criticized the videogame industry for its sexist portrayals of female characters were inundated with threats of violence and sexual assault. In accordance with many academics who study the far right, this “scandal” was the perfect gateway drug to drag vulnerable young men and boys towards the right. The same people who championed gamergate and spread anti-feminist misinformation online have always been deep seated incels. Alex DiBranco, in his article Mobilizing Misogyny, writes that “…the virulent misogyny promoted by male supremacists, often couched as anti-feminism and accompanied by racism and nativism, has serious repercussions that play out on a global stage.” DiBranco points to the multitude of mass shootings targeting women where the shooters stated they were “fighting feminism” or going after the “radical feminist agenda”.
Many young men today have become enamored with a plethora of content creators who spend their time building an online image as self-proclaimed hypermasculine gurus. These grifters preach extreme forms of “traditional” gender norms where men are meant to be stoic, loveless
entrepreneurs. These influencers endorse a view of women to which they are deemed to be emotional, untrustworthy objects meant to be controlled. In their ideal world, women are barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. Such content creators prey on the insecurities of men who feel left behind, weak, or inadequate in order to charge them money for online courses. An article from 2024 by Craig Haslop, Jessica Ringrose, Idil Cambazoglu and Betsy Milne outlines the ways in which such content targets young boys between the ages of 13 to 14 and upholds “harmful versions of hegemonic masculinity connected to sexual and gender-based harassment and violence.” The article outlines how leaders of this online movement build up a false veneer of authenticity, which they appeal to in order to justify their misogyny.
We need better role models for young men. Presently, there is an alarming amount of online personalities working tirelessly to entrench hegemonic masculinity. Most fields of interest for young men, such as going to the gym, are dominated by these right-wing, sexist influencers. What happens as a result is, best case scenario, a subconscious bias against women, or, worst case scenario, outright radicalization. It is therefore crucial that we as a society encourage more constructive forms of masculinity and root out norms that harm both men and women alike. Before we are able to properly legislate, there needs to be a push to embrace empathy and combat patriarchal socialization in education and the media. Otherwise, it won’t matter how many laws are passed, the source of the problem will still remain unaddressed.
If what’s been written here doesn’t engulf you with rage, then you could be part of the problem. The burden to address this falls squarely on the shoulders of all men. It is on us to hold ourselves and others accountable and to fight for a better future. We must recognize that it isn’t hard to treat women as equals and that those who would encourage us to be “anti-feminist” have darker, more despicable agendas at play. It is imperative that we make it the norm to treat all people with respect and to ostracize anyone who crosses the line. I urge any man reading this to not remain a bystander. A few words of intervention can go a long way in fostering safer environments for women. One day, many of today’s young men will become fathers. With this in mind, we should strive to create a better world where our mothers, sisters, and daughters can live free from fear and harassment. That is the masculinity we should aspire to. That is the future we should all strive for.
Alec Kushmerek
